Alrighty then. As I wrote in my last blog post..I'm going back to blogging. I also wrote that I am working on my health issues; mainly my weight. About a month ago I attended a family birthday party, then someone thought they would be funny to mention my weight gain by asking.."You pregnant?" and tapped my belly. source I was mortified. My weight gain has been a source of angst for me. I wanted to have a good time that night, but I felt like I was under a microscope. Earlier that evening I picked out a blouse that I thought would sort of hide my weighty faults. I guess it didn't work. When it came time for dinner I put very little on my plate and all night fought tears as others enjoyed themselves. I forgave the person who said the idiotic comment, (He's Old) but the sting of his "joke" hurt for days...and if I'm honest...still. As a teen and up until my thirties I was very very slim. Even after I had my first child I lost the weight rather quickly. I figured out that breast feeding really helped with the loss of the extra pounds. The OBGYN I had then strongly suggested that I wear a spandex girdle to encourage everything in my belly area to go back into place. It worked! Two and a half years later I was pregnant again. This time I gave birth to a much bigger baby and for some odd reason I decided not to wear a girdle. BIG mistake. I went back to work 7 weeks after my son was born, so breast feeding was more difficult and ended sooner than with my daughter. After I turned 40 the pounds started to gradually pile on. In the last two years My Doctor has commented on it over and over again. She was kind though, but ugh I hated getting on that scale. Even so I still felt I could pull it off.... Until this past year. Clothes have become so uncomfortable! Going shopping has turned into something I DREAD. Jeans fold over and let my muffin top hang out. Blouse sleeves tighten and squeeze my upper arms. If I run everything jiggles and bounces and trips up my rhythmic flow. I dread seeing people I haven't seen in a while because as much as they don't want to react....they do. I'm like that TV cop that looks for Micro facial changes that would indicate proof that they think me a big fluffy blob. Most try to just stare at my face avoiding the whole flabby body source
Their slight twitchy eye means "Sheeeeeez, Joanne has gotten big!" The slight frown after a smile would say "Holy Fa molies! she's HUGE!" The reddening neck would say "Quick, what can I say that's positive?" My energy and mood have been super low, and the clincher (as I wrote in a previous post) was the bad results from my medical physical. I am now 53 years old and I have been saying I'm going to lose the weight for years and years. So recently I said "ENOUGH!" I downloaded an app to my phone. It's one of those apps where you list everything you eat during the day. You can even scan the bar codes of items and it will give you the calories and fat per portion. I know I should be able to do this on my own , but for some reason seeing it there on my phone really keeps me in check. I've stopped drinking sweet drinks like soda (except for a juice once a day) and just drink water or seltzer. Portion control and watching my fat intake (and especially cholesterol) will inevitably help with this process. Its not going to be overnight, but I will lose the weight if I stick to a healthy plan. And one more thing...juicing. It really works to curb the appetite and give me that needed energy mid-day. I'm off to a good start, but if anyone jokingly ever asked me again if I am pregnant...I might bop them in the head and say "Oh sorry, it must be those raging pregnancy hormones"
OK, Taking a little too long of a breather Will I ever write anything again? Have I let "Life" tackle and keep me down? Has my Mojo abandoned and kicked me to the curb? When no one I knew read my blog...I sat down tirelessly everyday to write and write. It was awesome to have comments from bloggy buddies and others who did not know me. They came back often and I visited them. Something happened though when others that I knew in person found my blog. I started to feel a bit cautious and exposed...weird right? The blog was "taking too much time"...my Husband would say. Writing here was my release from the push and pull of the day. I went from HAVE TO to WANT TO as I put the stress behind me and wrote away on my slow computer. He didn't understand...but as he complained I started to feel a time crunch. Some would stop by and didn't agree with what I was writing.... ... AND? Some, (when they found out about my blog) never bothered to read it at all. If I must be honest I don't know which bothered me more.
When I was hidden behind just my first name I felt a freedom and joy that I hadn't felt in a long time when it came to writing. This blog was my own little space and no one else's. The rules were mine to follow and change at MY will. It was important to me; and because it was important to me I thought people would understand. The only ones who did were the bloggers who also found their happy Writer's place in their own blogs.
source This year was a tough one. Both my In-laws suffered life threatening illnesses which have left them both in need of nursing care that stay throughout the day. My own Mother needs constant care and attention. My daughter graduated and is now attending her first semester away at college. I miss her. My stress, sadness and a bit of loneliness has kept me from this little blog. Too many changes in such a short amount of time has really given me a one two punch. source I guess the clincher was about a week ago when the doctor called about my annual physical....Cholesterol was HIGH Um, maybe my test was switched with someone else's? She mentioned my weight gain how dare she!
I have got to change this. I cannot change anything until I change myself. So the very next day I started. I've changed my diet. (OK, I cheated last night...It was the annual Church Women's Christmas party) I'm countering the fatigue that I feel with juicing once a day. This week I will be starting an exercise routine. Oh, and I'm going back to blogging....I don't give a damn what people think. I'm getting my Happy place back With all these changes in my life there plenty to write about.
Hi All! Today is Friday and that could only mean that some art is on it's way! A while back I posted art from an Artist named Riusuke Fukahori. He painted on resin and made his subject look three dimensional. If you'd like to take a little peek-a-loo...here is the link. Goldfish Salvation. He is Awesome! Well, I found another artist that creates art using resin and his art is incredible too. His name is Gerardo Chierchia. Here is a video that follows his process...amazing! Please enjoy
Hi All! Today I wanted to write about "The Blame Game"...or otherwise known at our house as...Lets blame Mom/or the Wife for every stinkin' thing that happens in our home. Now when I say everything, I mean only the bad things. source If something is lost it's because I "Hid" it somewhere...Bwahahahaha source If something is broken...everyone looks at me, because even though they may have done it....the item was too delicate...and it's my fault for bringing it into a home full of klutzes...etc. source If a tool from my husband's tool box is missing ...well, heck I must have used it and hid it ....in another part of his tool box! source and if an important piece of mail is gone from the Mount Everest pile that my husband has....well, damn-it-all if I didn't take it and throw it out. All MY FAULT But not really. If something is lost, then it's probably where it SHOULD be and not on the freakin' floor where my family left it. If a Tool is missing it's probably in the tool box to the right or immediate left of where it usually is...in other words hidden in plain sight And If my husband is missing an important piece of mail It's probably because I moved it to the office and filed it under "IMPORTANT MAIL". Anyhoo, recently I went down to the laundry room and tried to turn on the light and it wouldn't work. I even tried to replace the light bulb and...no go. I called down the Hubster Me: "Light doesn't work, I think the switch is broken." Hubster: "What'd you do to it?" Me: "Nothing, It's just broken." Hubster: "Things just don't break Joanne. SOMEONE had to break it." Me: "Well, I didn't break it" Hubster: "Well, I certainly didn't break it...I'm never down here." Right, please remind ME again that I'm the ONLY one that does stinkin' laundry Me: "Look, can you fix it? because I really don't want to play the Blame game right now" Hubster: "Blame Game?" I'm just saying that you are the only one that comes down here and you probably broke it that's all." Me: "You're starting to annoy me." So the Hubster goes upstairs and I'm guessing he's going to go out to buy a new switch. I grabbed what clothes I could so I could fold some upstairs. I walk past the kitchen where my husband is sweeping up a mess. Upon closer inspection I see that it's a glass that he's accidently broken. Me: "Hmmmm whatcha got there? Did YOU break a GLASS?!?"
Hubster: "Yes, I broke a glass." Now Ordinarily I never gloat, but darn if it didn't feel good to yell.... "YES!!! KARMA!!!" He's lucky he is cute.
Heard this song a while back catchy tune and since my daughter is nursing a broken heart I thought it appropriate. Keep going forward Sweetie, God has his plans for you!
Have a Awesome weekend everyone I hope it's full of beautiful new beginnings
Years ago I taught my niece some patty cake songs and every now and then she asks to play. I remember in school my friends and I would play with four girls and there we were hands up and under clapping side to side, perfectly timed and singing a memorized song. Miss Mary Mack doesn't compare to what I found for you! Recently I came across a song by Adele covered by KHS, Sam Tsui, Madilyn Bailey, Alex G and they did it to a hand clapping routine...amazing! I think they are awesome! Please enjoy this week's Artsy Fartsy post... Send My Love- Adele- Patty Cake Cover
Yep, I'm one of those people. I don't like to ask for ... source
I just don't and that's bad...very bad But I LOVE to help others source and that's good... very good. Soooooo what happens to the person that likes to help and never asks for help? People think that you never need help...that's what. They think that you have it all figured out source I sure don't They think nothing fazes you source They're WRONG WAHHHHHHHHH!
They think I'm super organized because I help them with their messes source I need lists to remind me of other lists...and those lists are under tons of lists that I have ignored for months I always think that problems of others (even if they are the same as mine) are bigger and more in need of attention...but as my Sister-in-Law always says.... " A pebble in a shoe is a pebble in a shoe" Which means dear bloggy buddy, that everyone has problems and some might seem bigger but even the seemingly small ones bother and hurt.
Recently, I have decided to lay it all out there... and ask for help when I need it. Ya know what happened when I tried to open my mouth? Another person opened theirs first....and lets just say that I will keep that pebble in my shoe a little while longer, while I go and help my friend with their boulder. source
