Lose your keys
The phone rings
Get a stain on your perfect outfit
2. Your house is clean and tidy ...no one pops by
Your house is a MESS....everyone decides they must visit unexpectedly
3.Your baby can sleep through construction noise
But she will awaken from the sound of you turning in bed
4.You have made your special recipe a million times but when you make it for that one special occasion...It's turns out horribly
5. You walk out of the house and realize you have shaved only one leg
These next six deserve a category all their own...Bodily functions
6. Just before a GYN exam you feel the worst gas pains
7. Right when its quiet~ elevator, library, meeting your stomach starts to sound like something from the
8. You never have a problem with sweating but pit stains will appear and grow during a first date or talk
9. Something will fly out of your nose when talking to someone/ never when you are alone
10. During a bathroom break you will find that you have been talking to people with a poppy seed, pepper,
or spinach stuck to your teeth.
11.While trying to stifle a sneeze or laugh; you fart loudly
12. The office weasel will always get promoted first
13. At a wedding you will always get stuck sitting next to the person who can't stop talking
14. Just when you shovel your driveway along comes the snow plow to bury you again
15.You are strapped for time and you try to get on the shortest check-out line. You find that the person in front of you has trouble with their card, price, has a thousand coupons, or will be determined to pay the exact change even if it means looking through every pocket and flap of purse, or decides to go back to get just one more thing!
16.You sit on the toilet only to find that there is no toilet paper (since you are the only one that changes it you can only blame yourself cause God knows it's too hard a chore for the rest of the cotton pickin' family)
17.You spend hours blow drying and styling your hair only to be caught by a surprise windy rain shower.
18. Just when you feel a bit above water in the money situation...the car needs servicing, or major appliance breaks down (see post Death of a Vacuum, Printer and Anything Else?) or medical bill arrives.
19.(This one is for us voluptuous curvy gals) That perfect blouse in the perfect color will Never be available in our size.
20. At the office there will always be that lady that wears way too much perfume and it usually smells like a combo of formaldehyde and a cat-litter box.
21.You think you dance pretty well ...until you see a video of dance...(to tell you the truth I don't care about this one I love to dance and don't care what I look like!)
22.When commuting on a train or bus a person with onion arm pits or garlic breath will ALWAYS choose you to stand/sit next to.
23. Just when you decide to treat yourself to a cookie or piece of cake your family members have not only eaten the last of it but left the empty box on the shelf. This also goes for juice, soda and milk.
24. Right after you set you cell phone on silent...you lose it
25.The prettier the shoes the more pain you'll be in when wearing them
I wrote all of this because if you are having a bad day please take solace that you are not alone. We all have our yuk days and perhaps this will make you smile or chuckle a bit.
Well I think I have covered a lot if you have any others please feel free to add. I'm going to take ten minutes to sit back and enjoy some of my secret stash of chocolate.................................................
"WHO THE #ELL ATE ALL MY CANDY????!!!!!!!"